As teachers, parents, and mentors we want to influence the minds of our students so that they choose wisely and excel at what they choose to do. In an autocratic society like feudal Japan proper behavior was demanded, and strictly enforced by reward and punishment. In many of our relationships in a more democratic society, when we are in a position of authority, the judicious application of the reward/punishment model can compel a desired behavior. However to encourage self determination, inspire responsible decision making, and motivate our students or children to excel we should respect their social equality.
A dojo is an autocratic environment. For reasons of safety, efficient instruction, instilling respect, and tradition, rules for conduct and etiquette are taken seriously. Progress is rewarded, mistaken behavior is discouraged. In some cases physical punishment is applied, however even in traditional schools, like the American Budo College, this is usually as a logical consequence of the behavior.
Shihan Goody exacted discipline. He could be, and was, autocratic and intimidating. However he taught with extraordinary empathy. He led by example, a life of honor, and service, and remarkable achievement. He taught brilliantly, demanding but always encouraging. He let his students at all levels and ages, know that he expected a lot of them. From youth judo students to ranking black belts we all worked hard to live up to his expectations. All students were treated with respect, as fellow warriors, regardless of rank.
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Walter F. Doris, Sensei, Jujutsu Go Dan, ABC,
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Shihan Goody and Sensei Doris taught me many lessons for Empowering students to develop their potential, among them:
Empathy, teach with the needs of the students, not the teacher, foremost in your mind.
Example, follow and teach the Way. Be a good example.
Encourage, not just with praise, but the encouragement that allows self discovery.
Expectations, what you expect is usually what you experience. Alter a man's expectations and you change his life.
In later years I learned about the Pygmalion effect, or principle. The way in which people view you influences your behavior. The way in which you view people, the expectations you have of them, influence their behavior. Call someone a warrior and he or she will behave like a warror. The negative corollary is proverbial. "Call a man a thief and he will steal."
It is a axiom of Saimen Jutsu that to influence another person's mind you must first control your own. To face a belligerent enemy without showing anger or fear is disarming thing. In formal training we would practice receiving attacks with quiet mind, and defending dispassionately, until each attack and defense became a meditation. Even the posture we take in facing a potential attack, the ready stance (fudo dachi), facing forward with feet shoulder width apart, knees and arms slightly bent, seeks to dissuade hostility, neither provoking nor inviting aggression while subtly preparing for a sudden attack.
It is hard to overstate the importance of meditation in preparing mentally for a potential confrontation. Learning to calm the mind by regularly practicing zazen, whether using visualization, or mantra, or simply breathing with deliberate awareness, you develop a pathway that, with a mental picture, or silent chant, or a deep breath can slow your racing heart and focus your thoughts even in a crisis.
It's much harder to attack someone who's neither angry nor afraid, but simply willing to hear the reason for the hostility. Most confrontations would be defused if only one person would avoid escalating. If an attack does occur the stance, and the state of quiet readiness, make practiced avoidance a spontaneous reaction.
The way you face an adversary influences his behavior. His perception of what you expect will depend more on body language and manner than words. Knowing that you have the skills to defend yourself, and the practice to manage your emotions, you can be calm, and walk away from most fights without any violence. A fight is over when you can safely walk away.
If a situation escalates and you find yourself having to defend against an attack, nothing about your posture betrays your fighting skill, while everything from your eye contact to your lack of anger or fear create doubts and hesitation in would be bullies or assailants. The kiai (warrior's shout) can disrupt an attack and freeze the attacker while amplifying your counter-attack.
Your greatest weapon is your enemy's mind - Buddha
Shihan demonstrated and taught both aspects of mind control. I saw him encourage and calm competitors at tournaments, teach advanced classes demonstrating jaw dropping excellence of technique, and teach Judo to the kids classes, along with lessons of life . His ability to place suggestions in minds of his (willing) top competitors and teachers, suggestions that strengthened them, was like hypnosis without the induction process.
As for controlling the mind of potential enemies, Shihan was like the proverbial sword, so sharp that when placed in the autumn stream, leaves floating in the water would turn aside from it. None dared to be his enemy. Or so it seemed to me.
Benevolence, wishing well even for one who would be your enemy, is one of the cornerstones of Bushido. Meditation has been, for me, key to experiencing Benevolence, a feeling of empathy toward others, not just friends, but enemies. My meditation sessions with an Indian Guru, Acarya Nityananda, led me to feel a compassion for others I'd only intellectualized before.
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